Saturday, 26 December 2009

Gender Bender

Hello lovers, I have a feeling that this is not gonna be a funny one. Today I am discussing the ever mysterious question why girls and boys are so fucking different. Or aren’t they? Hmm well, let’s see.

It’s Christmas time hence I have been watching loads of ├╝ber cheesy Christmas romances on telly. I have to admit though that the one with Jude Law, Cameron Diaz and Kate Winslet wasn’t that bad, it kinda struck a nerve…anyway I am digressing again. Whilst watching these saccharine romances it struck me how gender roles are portrayed in them. Completely stereotypical and static that is. Sooo it got me thinking. Is there some truth to it? Do girls always have to be passive and cute and talk a lot? And do boys always have to be the protector, the ones who take care of things and don’t talk???

Okay so here are a few things that I want/need/must know answers to: Why do girls always have to be so vocal about stuff and why can’t they ever shut the fuck up. Especially with me it’s that I always have to talk (LOADS) about the boy I currently fancy/hate/find annoying and even though I have detected that if I just don’t talk about it; I stop caring much earlier, I still can’t ever shut the fuck up. Hence I make life harder for myself…anybody ever got the same problem or is it me-specific??

That brings me right to my next point; boys just don’t talk about feelings and is that why they just don’t care most of the time? Is it because they don’t analyse a situation (any situation) to death that they can simply forget about it in like 5 seconds? I wanna be like that too, just not bother with shit.

I also admire that thing in boys (at least what I think it is, not that I KNOW it’s really there) that they can easily compartmentalise their feelings, which girls don’t seem to be able to do. I mean they can just have one-night stands and feel fine afterwards whereas I believe girls get attached instantly, not only with sex even with just a kiss, and now that’s sucky, don’t you agree? But maybe it’s also more genuine, I don’t know…and another thing how come for boys there’s two categories of girls, the ones they wanna shag and the ones they wanna marry, whereas for girls there’s only the categories of the ones they want to be friends with and the ones they want to be in love with? Seems a bit unfair doesn’t it? I want some non-committal brainless fun too, but I guess my heart doesn’t. And then we come to the unspeakable, does it really all come down to evolution? Boys wanna spread their seed and girls want to have babies...damn.

Okay some other things that bother me: Why is it when girls have cats they get called ‘oh that one’ or ‘spinster’ straight way and when boys have cats it ‘cute’. Unfair! Why do girls always have to wave? I have never !!!NEVER!!! seen a boy wave? Why? Why do girls over-analyse everything, do boys analyse too and just not talk about it, is that the difference, I must know! Is sex really that important for boys and why? Why do they need it more than girls, or do they? Why are good bands male? Why are there no (or hardly any) good female bands especially when it comes to more noisy/hardcore music? I don’t know any female band that does wall-of-sound music but about 3656 male bands that do, why? And yes I know I know there are some female bands but ‘The Like’ aren’t a particularly good example, are they? Do boys check their mobile when they are expecting a text/call from someone they fancy and if yes do they check it every 10 seconds too? Guess what I don’t think they do, I believe they probably go and play football somewhere and then when the girl finally texts they have just finished the game and gone to the pub, which means that she will have to wait for a reply for 56 minutes, exactly….and there we go again, boys don’t wait for texts, they have better things to do. And my final question is: Is ‘the fear’ universal? Do boys get the fear and yes I know they get commitment fear but do they also get the ‘Oh dear I don’t know if I am handsome/smart/funny/worthy enough fear’??

Dear readers oh please enlighten me.

Laters, Linda

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