Hello lovers sorry for my 4 (!!!!) days of absense (is that how you spell it, im well tired) but I have been living the bender dream and riding the wave in paradise, if you know what I mean?
Oh and by the way, 'If you know what I mean' is so my new catch phrase though I am a bit worried that it's too chav-tastic, if you know what I mean?
Anyway, I digress, as per usual, tonight's post is all about boys, so no surprise there....
I will be 'discussing' and 'dissecting' 10 ways of how not to get hung up on a boy. Read and learn, or maybe just have a good laugh. Shizzle my humour (??) is totally not working tonight, forgive me dear readers, maybe it's because of the time of night or due to my lack of sleep, food, drink, proper contemplation time or general rest.
So here we go
Linda's top ten tips of how to avoid being hung up on a guy:
1. Make out with a randomer
2. Make out with a hot guy
3. Make out with your hang-up's best mate
4. Make out with your hang-up's ex-girlfriend (ouch)
5. Wear a fabulous dress and get many compliments for it
6. Get a reality check and come to terms with the fact that he's a loser/mega-minger/boring/so not your type or all of the above...if he's a right babe though, now that would suck, but come on, let's be serious, that's not gonna happen
7. Look at his disgusting toes, nails, teeth or hair long enough
8. Listen to him talk about himself/his crappy music taste endlessly. Alternatively, listen to him whine about his shitty life endlessly. That will put you right off
9. Just hang out with your mates and and realise that they are way more fun
10. Just don't go there in the first place. No hook up, no hang up!
Now give me a hug, it's gonna be okay, I promise.
I also made a Spotify Playlist for your pleasure, it's called "Now fuck off boy"...Enjoy!