Morning guys, how are you today?
Last night, while I was religiously watching ‘The City’ again, a repeat episode that I have probably watched for the 24th time, an idea came to me. While Whitney was left heart-broken by Jay, who chose his shitty band over her (what do I keep saying about boys in bands?) she turned into a right sentimental bag of misery. Then Diane von Fuerstenberg (YES!!) came and sat next to her and tried to talk sense into Whit. She discussed long distance relationships explaining the complicated beauty of them with a lovely analogy.
Diane (yes we are on first name terms) said: “Absence is to love what wind is to fire. If it’s a small fire then a weak gust of wind will kill it. If, however, it’s a big fire, it will just intensify it.” WORD.
That got me thinking. Are long-distance relationships the shizzle or are they just shit? What do you reckon?
As they say absence makes the heart grow fonder, but does absence make the heart grow foul sometimes, too?
The pros of long-distance relationships surely are that whilst you and your loved one are apart you miss each other, you long for each other, which then just intensifies any reunion. Having a long-distance relationship is basically like being totally crushed out all the time. You’re constantly thinking about the other person and when you see the other person; you’re ecstatic, blissed out, totally high on love. But is that really the way to conduct a healthy relationship? I’m not sure.
By not being with the other person you will also not get to know all their little every-day quirks properly, you won’t spend enough time with them to be annoyed about their little quirks or to even get used to them and ultimately you might not get to know them properly and that brings me right to the cons of long-distance relationships.
If you have a temper or if you tend to be a jealous person, long-distance relationships are bound to spell trouble for you. If the poor guy won’t answer his phone straight away, you’ll think he’s having an affair. If the poor guy hangs out with his female flatmates, you’ll think he’s having an affair. If the poor guy talks about Molly (his cat), you’ll think he’s having an affair. He is NOT having an affair though, stop being paranoid. Not being with someone complicates things, as stuff simply doesn’t happen right in front of you. That could make you feel slightly out of control of the situation and that kind of feeling is surely not conducive to a healthy relationship.
So ultimately I have to agree with Diane. If it really is love then it’ll work wherever you are. You might just have to work a little harder and trust a little more. But we all like a challenge, don’t we?
Laters Linda x