Some of my favourite things this year....
Oya festival and Norwegians
Football world cup – well played boys, well played
Cutting my hair and not becoming ‘that girl’
Crack Magazine and my first piece for them
Discovering Miranda July and her unbelievably great short stories
Misfits – soooo good
Happy New Year! Linda x
Hello blog lovers, after I’ve let loads of smart guys and girls talk about feelings and shit like that on my blog, I thought it might be a good idea to interview some of my favourite bloggers, because, let’s face it, ultimately they know where it’s really at.
So please meet Karley, who’s the author of one of the most out-spoken and most well-written blogs out there : Slutever. (If you’re of faint-hearted disposition, don’t click on the link. Loser.)
I admire Karley because she talks about what no-one else dares to talk about. Sometimes it’s gross (if you find bodily fluids gross), but it’s always great. She’s an imaginative writer, a strong person and doesn’t give a shit what people think and that’s how I like my bloggers. Karley – I salute you!
I asked her some questions about her blog and love, read what Karley had to say below.
Why did you start your blog?
I started Slutever in the summer of 2007. At the time I was living in a squatted, disused hostel in south London with 12 other people, all in our early 20s. It was such an unusual and extreme time in all of our lives, so I started writing the blog, intending mainly to create a written record of everything that went on in the house. At the beginning the only people who read it were the people I lived with.
What’s your favourite blog/blogs/website?
A friend recently told me about a website called Arts and Letters Daily, which spotlights the best magazine and newspaper articles published each day. It’s a really great resource, I love it! Also, photographer Jamie Taete’s blog is mega lolz.
How do you know someone fancies you?
I don’t know... the guys I tend to fancy are either super shy and awkward, emotionally retarded, or gay. So I can only really say for sure once they are inside me, and even then it can be a toss up. But I think in general, a sure sign that someone really cares about you is when they are visibly excited and happy to be around you, and go out of their way to do small things that they know will make you happy. Oh and when someone kisses you gently on the head, that is a total “I really like you” move. So like NOT someone who only calls you late at night while drunk, or who tries to put it in your ass when they think you’re not paying attention, even though you’ve told them multiple times that you’re not into that.
How do you get someone you fancy to make out with you?
I normally just go for the lean-in and hope they don’t back away. Sometimes they do back away, and that’s a bummer, but sometimes they DON’T, and then you’re totally in there! Also, I’ve found that not being disgusting looking helps, and it’s always a good idea not to be a failure, because that is unattractive.
When do you feel most like yourself?
All the time, really. Although I have to admit I totally adopt other people’s mannerisms and speech patters after spending a significant amount of time with them. It’s a subconscious thing. People always say that my friend Bunny--who I write about on my blog a lot--and I speak and act very similar, but really I think I just stole his personality and made it my own.
What life advice would you give to your 16-year-old self?
To read more! I think it’s so important. I’ve always enjoyed reading but I definitely didn’t do enough of it when I was younger. I’d also say to myself, “Bitch, you have to touch your clit when you have sex in order to cum! Most guys can’t get you there on their own, so you have to help them out!” I didn’t understand this when I was younger--that you basically need to masturbate during intercourse in order to have an orgasm. For that reason I didn’t cum during sex for the first four years that I was sexually active. WTF?!
What are you listening to at the moment?
My friend Ally just made me a playlist of 90s R&B. So good! So like lots of Boyz II Men, TLC, Blackstreet, All-4-One, Brandy, Aaliyah, K-Ci and JoJo, etc. It reminds me of being at middle school dances.
Maaaaan, there are a few things that become blatantly obvious in this girls’ series. Girls have no clue when guys fancy them and they don’t care about how much money is spent on a date only that some thought is spent on it. Girls also hate it when guys don’t text back.
What’s the first thing that attracts you to a guy?
A sense of humor and a nice smile.
How do you know someone fancies you?
I usually have no clue unless I am blatantly told. I'm pretty oblivious.
When do you feel most like yourself?
When I'm hanging out with my closest friends and family.
What life advice would you give to your 16-year-old self?
I'd tell her to not worry & stress out so much - everything works out, just enjoy it!
What’s the main difference between boys and girls?
I think girls tend to act on emotions and guys are usually more reserved and logical. But at the heart of it, there isn't THAT much of a difference between boys and girls.
What makes you fall for a guy?
Someone who can make me laugh and has similar interests. I like guys that are outgoing, laid-back and adventurous. And I love it when guys remember stupid things you've mentioned.
Do you believe in ‘moments’?
Yes.
What things put you off a guy most? What’s a deal-breaker?
Someone who smokes or does drugs. Also, I don't like guys who aren't into sports or are really arrogant.
If you could go out with any guy who would it be?
Ashton Kutcher or Carlos Bocanegra.
Three-day-text rule. Yes or no?
No, it's bullshit. If a guy likes a girl, he should text her and let her know.
What makes the perfect date?
It doesn't matter what you do as long as you can talk and have a good time. I don't think the perfect date has anything to do with how much money you spend, but rather how much thought the guy (or you) have put into it.
Beauty or Brains?
Both.
Style or Substance?
Substance. I don't like vain guys who worry about whether they're wearing the right pair of jeans.
Blonde or Brunette?
Both, but blondes are my weakness.
Husband or Hottie?
So this is what another girl thinks….
What’s the first thing that attracts you to a guy?
Well I guess initially it is looks, there has to be some attraction there, but ultimately it is personality, they have to make me laugh and I like a bit of banter.
How do you know someone fancies you?
I DON’T! It’s so hard to know and I always get it wrong, if I think someone likes me turns out they don’t!
When do you feel most like yourself?
When I'm around my friends and family.
What life advice would you give to your 16-year-old self?
Life gets a lot better! So enjoy being young and having no responsibilities and don’t get so stressed and worked up about things and people who aren’t worth your time.
What’s the main difference between boys and girls?
That is the million pound question!!
What makes you fall for a guy?
Good dress sense, personality, sense of humour, a little bit of arrogance and intelligence.
Do you believe in ‘moments’?
No
What things put you off a guy most? What’s a deal-breaker?
Their clothes (materialistic, I know!)
If you could go out with any guy who would it be?
Mark Ronson
Three-day-text rule. Yes or no?
NO!!
What makes the perfect date?
I don’t think there is a perfect date. It doesn’t matter where you are, how much money is spent. I think it is who you are with that makes it a great date.
Beauty or Brains?
Both
Style or Substance?
Has to be both
Blonde or Brunette?
Brunette
Husband or Hottie?
Hottie for right now but definitely husband in the future!
Morning blog lovers, so last week we learned a lot about how boys think and this week’s it’s time to find out about girls and their perspective on love, lust and losers. With pride I present to you the first installment in the series ‘From A Girl’s Perspective’. Boom.
What’s the first thing that attracts you to a guy?
Swagger. Cheekiness. Imperfection. Good banter. Unusualness.
How do you know someone fancies you?
No idea. I tend to think if boys look at you, they fancy you, but the reasons they look at you can be so varied, so basically yeah I’m completely clueless.
When do you feel most like yourself?
When I’m alone. When I’m going for long walks.
What life advice would you give to your 16-year-old self?
Don’t be scared to be different. Some people might hate it, but others will love it.
What’s the main difference between boys and girls?
Boys are pragmatic, girls are intuitive.
What makes you fall for a guy?
Wit. Wisdom. Worldiness. Warmth. When he’s good with words. When he’s good with a lot of things.
Do you believe in ‘moments’?
Real moments are rare, but when they happen, they mean something.
What things put you off a guy most? What’s a deal-breaker?
Cheaters. Players. Boys in bands. Good-looking guys, who know they are good-looking. Ugly guys who think they are good looking.
If you could go out with any guy who would it be?
It would have to be a guy, who is not scared of me. A guy who’s man enough to stand up to me. And most importantly a guy who knows what he wants and what he wants is me.
Three-day-text rule. Yes or no?
If you really like him, text back straight away. If you don’t really like him, don’t bother.
What makes the perfect date?
Randomness. Spontaneity. Getting outside of your comfort zone. I for example love to go on random bus trips to the middle of nowhere and then have a chicken burger. Or two and then go canoeing. I’m not one for fancy restaurants.
Beauty or Brains?
Brains.
Style or Substance?
Substance.
Blonde or Brunette?
I love it all.
Husband or Hottie?
Hot Husband.
Morning beloved readers, so this ‘From A Boy’s Perspective’ series is turning into a classic already. However, from the feedback I received from my loyal (mostly female) readership, this first guy is a nice guy, but puts on a show to impress and this second guy is really old and disillusioned with life.
Personally, I believe that today’s boy is the most truthful reflection of what guys are really like. Enjoy.
What’s the first thing that attracts you to a girl?
Physical attraction is instantaneous. I'm a leg man personally...
How do you know someone fancies you?
A visceral feeling. A simple glance or flirtatious chat can do it.
When do you feel most like yourself?
With close friends and family.
What life advice would you give to your 16-year-old self?
Lay off the....
Dangly bits. Jokes aside, men are from Mars and women are from Venus.
What makes you fall for a girl?
Beauty and compatibility.
Do you believe in ‘moments’
Yes.
Neediness.
If you could go out with any girl who would it be?
Katy Perry
Three-day-text rule. Yes or no?
No.
What makes the perfect date?
Plenty of jovial light-hearted laughter, good food, followed by sexy time.
Beauty or Brains?
Both.
Style or Substance?
Both.
Blonde or Brunette?
Brunette.
Wife or Vixen?
Wife to settle down with; Vixen to play with.
So yesterday I actually got a boy to talk about feelings. OMG. Today I have another one doing it, too. I don’t know what’s going on either, but it’s good. Read and learn.
What’s the first thing that attracts you to a girl?
Smart and reserved. I’m a quiet person so get deterred by loud 'in your face' girls.
How do you know someone fancies you?
So far I have no idea, I’m normally surprised when I find out. If they talk to me for longer than 2 weeks, I assume they either want to be my friend or they fancy me, that narrows it down.
When do you feel most like yourself?
In the winter, at my parents, hanging out with my dog and closest friends.
What life advice would you give to your 16-year-old self?
Try harder at school. Although I don't think I’d be anywhere different if I did. I only tried at the things I cared about, and school wasn’t one of them.
What’s the main difference between boys and girls?
I don’t think I know a girl well enough to compare to be honest!
What makes you fall for a girl?
Complacency but with ambition. I’m not one for 'career girls', there's more to life than a desk; but I hate the ones who feel they have to spend half their life travelling to 'find themselves'. I like girls who are satisfied with where they are, but are always thinking of where they're going.
Do you believe in ‘moments’?
Yes.
What things put you off a girl most? What’s a deal-breaker?
'Paid for' girls, not hookers, just girls who have had their destiny determined by other people's money and don’t have anything to show for themselves. That, and girls who immerse themselves in drama; life isn’t complicated so why make it so.
If you could go out with any girl who would it be?
At the moment, no one.
Three-day-text rule. Yes or no?
Maybe. I did it once without even realising it. Sometimes you need time to think about something and don't want to make a drama out of something it shouldn't be. Personally I’m pretty blunt, so I wouldn’t let a 'text rule' represent how I feel, I’d just give it to them straight.
What makes the perfect date?
I pay for everything, which doesn’t exactly make it perfect, but I’m so bad at everything else that's probably the only good thing a girl would take away from it - money saving, ASDA *slaps back pocket*
Beauty or Brains?
Both! I don’t think it works otherwise unless you're happy with being bored with your partner.
Style or Substance?
Substance. I’ve fancied loads of girls who aren't that stylish. You can be pretty and interesting but have no 'style'. I’m not fussed.
Blonde or Brunette?
Brunette. Every blonde scenario I’ve ever been involved with has fucked up. I like red hair though, like Rihanna red...
Wife or Vixen?
Wife, I’m boring.
